Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. -Judy Garland

Individuality.

Lets just get into this for a second. Why is it, that we are so fearful of being different? Instead of trying to understand something, we cast it away as being "weird", "strange", "uncool", whatever other word can mask it with. This is something I have been struggling with for a few weeks now. I know excatly when it started. I tend to let things "go" (let them build up) until I cant take it anymore. I never confront the situation. Ever. Its a downfall of mine. Anways, I have let a situation go for a long, long time. And, now, it tends to always be on my mind, consuming my thoughts. And I despise it.

After I am sure I have confused all my readers, when I vent, everything comes out a little mixed up.

I am about to turn 21 (June 5, ye-aahh). But the thing is, when I turn 21, I am not looking for a huge big, lets get smashed, act a fool party. I want to go out with a few close friends, and most imortantly ..remember my day.. I have already been made aware, that this is strange, stupid, and if they were me, they would be all liquored up {{cool. good for you}}

Im not a big girl. Im a size 8. I have a booty that would make Bubba Sparxx and the Ying Yang twins remix "Booty Rocking Everywhere" {{jk. Its not that big}}. I am ok with my figure. However, I am constantly reminded how I should be, and what to do in order to get there. {{I don't want to starve myself, maybe next week, K, thanks}}

I love the place I am in my life. I love where I live, the people I know. I have it made right here. I don' need to move to a sauve little city-wanna-be in order to be cool. Going 23 mph behind a John Deere is just part of life around here, and I am ok with that. {[I can take you for a ride on my big green tractorrrr}}

I don't attend college this semester. I pay for it myself, and am debt free.. I am proud of myself for that, do not try and belittle that. {{So suck on that ;)}}

I drive an old car, which is one less payment I have a month. And my parents don't pay a car payment for me. I really don't want to hear about your way awesome new car and how it gets 600 miles per gallon. Really. {{South Park can explain, look up the episode}}

My boyfriend (Yes, this is something I have forgotten to fill my blog readers in on), stop trying to down him, or the fact we're together. {{get over it, and be happy with your man}}

My curly, untamable, long hair, will one day, make a boy so insanely in love with me. Short straight dumb hair is just fine, and much easier, and trust me, you have made your point. But dont diss mine. My mom has the same hair. {{Truth is, I adore my mothers hair in the summer}}

I need to make this persons oppinions and statements a little less important in my life. Fact is, it really bothers me, and hurts me. I take it wayyy to seriously... Girls are possibly the most malicious, hateful, green-eyed witches on the face of the earth. Bloggers, really think about the words you are using, they can realy cut someone else deep. My mom tells me to laugh it off, and usually blames it on jealously. Here is the deal, instead of being so envious, appreciate that quality in the other person. Mean Girls is the perfect movie to explain the way I feel about girls.